36 Questions Date Night

Dear Stranger,

My husband and I have been having trouble connecting lately. We both aren’t very good at baring our souls to each other, so the majority of our conversations have been about fluffy stuff.

What’s going on in the news……what’s happening at work……what chores need to get done….

Around the time I started noticing this was happening, I found one of the best podcasts I’ve ever heard. It’s a three part musical called 36 Questions that tells the story of a couple on the brink of divorce, and their fight to fall in love again and stay together. And the story actually does center around the famous “36 questions designed to make you fall in love with anyone.”

I had heard of these questions before, but I thought they were only for strangers so I hadn’t bothered to look them up. But after listening to the musical I realized that these questions are perfect for any two people who want to become closer to each other.

I asked my husband if we could answer all of the questions ourselves, and we decided to make it into a date night in. We changed into our comfiest sweatpants, ran to the grocery store to get candy, and then got all cozy on the couch and got started.

And it felt SO nice. I learned so many new things about my husband – his thoughts, his feelings, childhood memories, funny stories, future dreams…it was awesome! And I felt like I got to share a lot about myself too that I might have never thought to bring up. Even more importantly, it helped us to break down the walls we tend to build and have a deeper connection. It helped us talk about important things that actually matter.

If you’d like to have your own date night in, all you need are the questions! I recommend copying us by wearing pajamas and eating junk food because it makes it ten times more fun! If you decide to do it, just be prepared to carve out a couple hours of your time, or plan to split it into two date nights. We almost wish we had split it, because towards the very end we were getting so sleepy that we started shortening our answers!

After we were done we talked about how we need to put more effort into having “real” conversations. We don’t know exactly what that means right now, but this date night is the perfect way to start connecting all over again.

I really recommend the podcast as well, it’s an excellent story. You can even make it into a second date night, by grabbing a project (something mindless you can do with your hands like painting, drawing, a jigsaw puzzle, etc) and listen to it together.

Note: Podcasts don’t have a very good rating system, so I give it an Allison rating of PG-13. The story is about a married couple so they do mention a physical relationship, but they don’t talk about it in any detail.

If you try out this date night I would love to hear all about it. And if you have any other ways you like to reconnect with people that you love, please share! 🙂

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